Posts Tagged ‘bully’

3 Bullying Facts

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From https://positivepsychology.com/bullying/


What Is Bullying? 3 Facts

  1. When does bullying most often occur?

Bullying persists at epidemic levels among children and adolescents (Harris, Lieberman, & Marans, 2007). It has been described as an adverse childhood experience (Stopbullying.gov, 2017).

Bullying is most common in childhood and adolescence (Aalsma & Brown, 2008). Up to three-quarters of young adolescents experience bullying (e.g., name-calling, embarrassment, or ridicule), and up to a third report coercion and even inappropriate touching (Juvonen, Nishina, & Graham, 2001).

  1. Does bullying affect only the victim? How long do the effects last?

Bullying has been found to affect the bullied person as well as the bully. Both are at greater risk of mental and behavioral problems, including a higher risk of depression (Smokowski & Kopasz, 2005).

The poor physical and emotional outcomes of bullying can affect an individual, both in the short and long term (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 2021).

A plethora of research shows that bullying experienced in childhood can go on to cause anxiety and depression (Stapinski et al., 2014) in young and middle adulthood (Copeland, Wolke, Angold, & Costello, 2013).

Adult suicidal attempts (Stapinski et al., 2014), poor financial management (Wolke, Copeland, Angold, & Costello, 2013), and poor career success as an adult are all negative outcomes (Takizawa, Maughan, & Arseneault, 2014).

  1. What type of profile does a bully or a victim possess?

There is not one single profile of a bully or someone affected by bullying. Bullies and victims can be socially included or marginally excluded (Stopbullying.gov, 2021). Either the bully or victim may have been in the role of a perpetrator and victim of bullying at some point in life (Leiner et al., 2014).

One interesting study found that bullies, victims, and those who have experienced both have a plethora of emotional, psychosocial, and behavioral problems (Leiner et al., 2014). This highlights that interventions are equally important for all groups, not only the victims.
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What do you do when Dad is your bully?

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What do you do when the person bullying you is your dad?

Many midwestern fathers wanted star athletes at all costs.

The end justified their means.

This could be labeled conditioned love.

Self-worth equals performance, you never reach worthy in their eyes.

Some mothers and daughters have their destructive dance through childhood also.

My father told me I needed to be twice as good as everyone else, so no one would question his coaching decisions.

Some moms and dads use their kids to fulfill their lost dreams or bring them adulation from parenting.

My family had discussions on how we looked to the world, and how we were judged by others.

The highly dysfunctional family strives to look perfect, they strain to present a positive image.

Not protecting the family’s secret of child abuse was a mortal sin.

I was afraid to report my father, I was a kid, and I was isolated without any support.

No child wants to be abandoned, we need our abuser to survive.

There is no escape, some of us lost the birth lottery.

My father tried to control my entire existence, he ignored my younger sister.

Narcissist value their kids differently, they need adulation and the kid who delivers gets the attention.

That attention brings anger, violence, and criticism, dad demanded perfection.

Their children battle to survive the traumatic situation.

I never thought what happened 60 years ago would be more powerful today than as a kid.

A soldier seems to never be able to forget or let the war go.

Trauma brings the past to life in our subconscious.
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