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PTSD operates without any conscious input from me, he feels like an internal entity, an invisible demon.
Yesterday while skirmishing with intrusive thoughts and emotions, I felt everything drop away momentarily.
Instead of being in the middle of the triggers, I was at a distance, separate, observing PTSDs mechanism.
I could feel life without PTSDs distractions or influence.
That dark cloud dissipated for a moment. How strange a feeling.
My nervous system calmed, while my anxiety and fear took a short vacation.
Life felt entirely different with PTSD being suppressed like this.
My first thought was, how do I make this last, perpetuate a life without the constant drama, danger, and anxiety of PTSD?
Is this a breakthrough or a fleeting moment?
I felt life as a normal person for the first time, I think.
I dream of a calm mind, a normal brain with normal thoughts, and a life filled with desire.
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Posted by fightfearlivelove on August 23, 2022 at 5:29 pm
This is awesome to read. I’m so happy for you Marty.
I use the headspace app and they use an example of blue sky. You are the blue sky and all off your negative thoughts etc. are clouds that can fill that sky. However even if the sky is full of clouds and that’s all you can see, the blue sky is still there behind it all. I find this analogy so useful as I fight my battles with depression and anxiety, and it’s great to hear you’ve been able to find your blue sky again yesterday.
I hope this is the start of an amazing journey for you. It will be tough along the way, but you’ve felt yesterday what you’re fighting for. You are awesome, valid and you deserve your happiness.
Keep pushing those clouds away!
Posted by Val Boyko on August 23, 2022 at 10:56 pm
Sharing from experience -this is not something that a “normal person” experiences, but an example of witness consciousness. Becoming a neutral observer of what is happening inside, is part of our inner growth and a gateway to awakening. 🙏🏼
Posted by Marty on August 23, 2022 at 11:48 pm
I agree
Posted by rudid96 on August 24, 2022 at 3:35 pm
First time I heard the term “witness consciousness.” Thank you for mentioning it and the associated explanation.
Posted by Jonathan Caswell on May 20, 2023 at 3:38 pm
Reblogged this on By the Mighty Mumford and commented:
A MOMENT’S RELIEF!