Childhood abuse: A Flawed self image

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My observations: In my opinion, the creation of a flawed self-image (Ego) is one of the strongest negative consequences of childhood abuse.

We never find our true self, we are lost, influenced by our past damage.

We lack the ability to love ourselves (self-love).

This is the foundation, the core we are missing.

We have no idea who we are supposed to be, trying to survive dominates our waking hours.

Trusting ourselves is rare, our flawed self-image brings many struggles.

Life never had easy-going moments, danger always stole the stage.

Yes, I have always felt extremely flawed, missing something other kids possessed.

My path did not include repairing these voids, I was lost inside PTSDs vortex of suffering.

It is a confusing life filled with turmoil and anxiety.

PTSD masks over desire, opportunity, and living fully.

I felt helpless and flawed as a kid, how was adulthood going to be any different?

PTSD becomes stronger over time, symptoms increase until we somehow improve or heal.

I question whether any severely abused kid heals or has a decent life.

The Ace study confirms our plight of suffering, mental disorders, addiction, disease, and early death.

https://traumainformedoregon.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/Adverse-Childhood-Experiences-Impact-of-Childhood-Trauma-on-Adult-Wellbeing-TIO.pdf

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8 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by rudid96 on August 24, 2022 at 3:40 pm

    Do severely abused & neglected children ever truly heal? If there are the right components and the universe tilts in their favor, my reply is “yes, but with limitations.” Triggers will always be present. Rebounding may/may not be quicker depending upon regular ongoing support. I don’t think children will ever be similar to those without abuse and neglect.

  2. Very optimistic

    We hold out hope

  3. Posted by rudid96 on August 24, 2022 at 6:15 pm

    Yes, we hold out hope. It’s all we have.

  4. In a perfect world, I’d like to think we could heal. I suppose it would really depend on the degree of healing you are looking for. What is normal, anyway? I have friends who were never hit as a child but they are just as mentally messed up as I am, just with different struggles. I feel like I’ve finally managed to make some progress with my cptsd but it meant I had to stop all communications with my father and most of my family to be honest. I don’t think I would consider myself healed if I had no episodes due to the fact that I removed the biggest trigger.
    A couple of years ago I found myself in the same vicinity as the man who sexually assaulted me for 5 years as a child. I thought I was “over it” until the trigger was there there. I had been able to talk about it, accept it, move on…Until I saw him. But I wouldn’t want to put myself in that situation daily until seeing him didn’t phase me anymore because I assume I would be nearly insane by that point.
    I just hope that one day I can fully forgive my past, greet my inner child with the compassion she deserves and smile from my heart. That is when I’ll consider myself healed.

  5. I wonder if full healing is ever possible too…I tend to go down the path when things are calm and seemingly safe….”this is a calm before the storm”….waiting for the shoe to drop. It’s just how I think. Trauma and abuse is forever invasive. At least for me it is.

  6. For the vast majority we must try like hell to have as much happiness as possible

    Healing is a dream

  7. Very true. I agree wholeheartedly. Seek joy daily ❤️

  8. The bad times should last as little as possible

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