sit with shame and innocence, or rage and the feeling of empowerment

From The Deep Heart:

“Conversely, sometimes a wave of emotion can be so strong that we are overwhelmed by it in the moment.

An emotional storm may need to pass before we are calm and clear enough to more intimately approach it.

In such cases, it is more useful to resource ourselves first.

This may mean focusing on an area of our body that feels peaceful and relaxed or turning our attention to the outer environment and doing something calming and grounding.

We can learn to move our attention back and forth (pendulation) from a hyperaroused inner state to a calm one, as well as take our difficult experiences in smaller doses (titration).

If an emotional state is too intense to bear, you can also experiment with placing your attention on its polarity or opposite.

Once it is in the foreground of your attention, let both emotional polarities coexist in your awareness.


For example, sit with shame and innocence, or rage and the feeling of empowerment, and notice what happens.”

6 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by rudid96 on July 25, 2022 at 9:51 pm

    This is something I’m trying to work with at the moment. Tackling emotionally charged topics takes courage.

  2. Go slow and choose mildly upsetting at first

    Then proceed to the tough stuff

  3. Posted by rudid96 on July 25, 2022 at 9:56 pm

    The hardest part about addressing charged topics is the dissociation. The body runs away (so to speak), and the mind shuts down. I know many others have spoken of this phenomenon. It’s like being thrown into a black hole. One can only wait until it passes and I can feel my arms and legs again.

  4. Mine piss me off now, not afraid

    I want revenge

    A different attitude

    Resentment is my emotion

    It feels like I am reliving the event

  5. Posted by rudid96 on July 25, 2022 at 9:59 pm

    Maybe one of the differences here is your tormenters are no longer living?
    Some of mine still are here. I do the best I can to navigate, but it can be challenging.

  6. Oh I have some alive

    The biggest betrayal blocks me and refuses to explain why

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