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My symptoms: A sort of hypervigilant state exists, an imminent danger feels close, and confusion reigns supreme.
It is like having another entity inside me, he comes out when PTSD danger arrives.
He has his own power source and control of this other world.
The vehicle used to influence is thought, worry, and doubt, reinforcing the abstract fear.
My nervous system heightens with my chest tight and my breath shallow.
The heightened feeling of danger drives my avoidance.
I retreat to my room, only going out for necessities.
Safety seems to be the ultimate goal. We never felt safe as a child, that feeling never completely leaves.
People feel extremely dangerous, old betrayals surface in my consciousness.
It is like I have entered the twilight zone of PTSD.
This unnatural state is extremely unhealthy, filled with depression and suffering.
I fight an internal battle most people never experience.
How do experience PTSD?
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PTSD - A Way Out.com 
Posted by Marty on June 29, 2022 at 1:11 pm
One huge consequence to all this is the suppression of desire.
Life is shallow when desires are squashed by fear and PTSD
I have lost interest, any passion for life, in the midst of PTSD
It is like being transported back to a time where we had zero control of our life
That was a entire childhood for me
The damage done in childhood made me vulnerable for the rest of my life
I have read many stories of lives filled with tragedy from being abused as a kid.
I see being terrified as a child never left my brain
We have no one to trust,
My father would not put up with anyone interfering with his control.
No mentor was allowed near me
Isolation is what abusers use to control, well that and violence