.
.
.
We were betrayed by our caregivers. Trust never had a chance.
The place where trust originates is a stew filled with danger and violence.
.
.
.
Trust is a foreign concept, an abstract thing like love, we have no idea what they are about.
There will never be a core of trust to lean on.
People have always felt untrustworthy.
Think about that.
Is it why we isolate and avoid, never trusting beyond our shallow connections.
At 70 I avoid being around people as much as possible.
The reason: Abstract fear, awkwardness, anxiety, triggers, and a lack of desire to mingle with strangers.
Complex PTSD has damaged my life, and narrowed my experience.
Oh, I have high hopes of healing but life is painful and humiliating.
Normal people desire attachment, I feel the opposite.
.
.
PTSD - A Way Out.com 
Posted by The Alchemist on June 26, 2022 at 3:12 pm
Thank you for this. It seems when I’m vulnerable as of late this is reinforced and it makes my heart hurt and symptoms flare up.
Posted by Marty on June 26, 2022 at 3:15 pm
Our symptoms will continue to flare up until we die I believe
Our life and thoughts are different
Posted by The Alchemist on June 26, 2022 at 3:20 pm
I’m learning that, I try to move beyond with CBT, but I’m understanding my best is not like everyone else’s.
Posted by Marty on June 26, 2022 at 3:24 pm
I have run through the therapies and holistic healers and meditation but remnants remain
It is that we have daily effort that is important
Posted by The Alchemist on June 26, 2022 at 3:27 pm
Thank you. That’s a good reminder! I’ve done those things to, and sometimes I fall down on the daily effort part.
Posted by Marty on June 26, 2022 at 3:31 pm
We all are vulnerable and weak at times during the day
It is never giving up that is important
Thanks for your insight
Posted by The Alchemist on June 26, 2022 at 3:44 pm
Thank you ❤️🙏
Posted by Marty on June 26, 2022 at 3:44 pm
We journey together not in competition
Posted by rudid96 on June 26, 2022 at 4:02 pm
Connections; we seek and find, then retreat, and seek again. Sandwiched between each layer is the wail of sadness, the recognition of the brokenness with floating flecks of hopefulness scattered helter-skelter. Intensity varies but the landscape remains.
Posted by Marty on June 26, 2022 at 4:10 pm
Not easy to navigate and when do we feel whole or secure
Evrr