.
from The Complex PTSD Workbook
.
.
“Shame is often hidden underneath perfectionism.
As a child, you may have internalized the belief that you had to act perfect because your parents couldn’t handle your authentic feelings.
Or perhaps you believed acting “good” would stop the bad things from happening.
In either situation, you may have had to hide your true feelings to avoid rocking the boat.
Perfectionism is maintained by critical self-talk that attempts to push down painful feelings.
When the inner critic berates you for being lazy, stupid, or useless, you are again confronted with your shame.
.
.
PTSD - A Way Out.com 
Posted by Angie on May 21, 2022 at 5:06 pm
I never saw it this way before. This is so accurate though!
I often say I am a “recovering perfectionist” because it’s something that we have to work on every day and always be aware of the inner voices constantly spitting criticism at us.
Posted by Marty on May 21, 2022 at 5:10 pm
I think childhood abuse fosters shame through perfectionist or rebellion
My dad started when I was too young to rebel
My dad told me I had to be twice as good as everyone else
Criticism was his way to motivate so perfectionism was real for me as a kid