More Happiness: External things and time

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Man created the clock, being late, showing up early, the past and the future. None of these times can help you experience happiness.

Remembering a past event can bring a joyful moment, any more time and energy spent, robs us of this moment.

It is similar to looking at photos, emotions roll in like an old song takes us back to an emotional time.

Predicting future happiness is a thought, nothing real
and not accurate. Even if this prediction comes true, that joy is fleeting.

What we can achieve can be lost, all impermanent possessions change in meaning and worth over time.

That promotion may bring resentment and jealousy from your peers. Protecting your title may bring worry and stress.

If you accept that happiness (wellbeing) only inhabits this present moment, how will you adjust your behavior, your thoughts, and actions?

All that seeking, Using external ways to find happiness seems misguided.

Happiness is not an emotion, not something we can achieve or accomplish with actions, it is an internal way of being, of living in the moment.

If we hunt for happiness, it will always be a stranger.

If we can be happy without needing to change or achieve a thing, will we stop seeking happiness out there?

If you are searching, try exploring your inner world, it is the core of happiness.
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12 responses to this post.

  1. It’s true: happiness is an inside job.

  2. It is true

    Approval is not under our control either

  3. No …. a hard truth for many of us to accept … but an important one to take on board.

  4. We crave approval

    Inclusiveness

  5. Yes it’s inside but we need to know inside to understand happiness 😊

  6. Posted by rudid96 on February 26, 2022 at 5:42 pm

    Beginning with the Rudyard Kipling post to the last couple on Happiness has been very timely for me. I’ve been wrestling (not sure who’s winning) with all kinds of emotions triggered by the realization, that once again, a friendship is inequitable. I realize that it’s my vulnerable, traumatized Ego that’s triggered. I read that Happiness isn’t dependent on temporal things or human connections. But, my heart is heavy and returns my mind back to Rudyard Kipling’s line “all men count with you, but none too much;” There’s truth in this but how much is from the Buddhist’s perspective and how much is from the Ego Protector parts trying to ensure relational safety and Ego protection?

  7. I thought the last post in my dad would bring a reaction from you.

    Our ego is us, we created him, how our caregivers treated us, how strangers and the world treats us and what we think of ourselves goes in the mixing bowl

    Out comes Marty and Rudid96

    He is stealthy, a silent controller, an instigator.

    Our ego is the one who feels slighted, he is the judge, the worrier, the worthless one

    My teacher says judge with your heart, not with the head of the cognitive machine.

    Our life does not work cognitively, using our heart is our best chance at navigation and happiness.

    Only be concerned for those who you respect for approval or judgment

    The rest can kiss your ass

    And mine

    There

    The path to happiness.

    A narrow darkly lit rambling road

  8. Life and friendships will always be inequitable Rudid

    We are not normal and are fighting an invisible war besides any relationship

    We can not devote the time or energy we can. We do not trust but they do

    We have triggers and episodes, we hide and need space, we are damaged, not good picks for a friend

    How can a relationship ever be equitable with us?

    We can not be there at times, we are lost in trauma, depression and anxiety

    We worry about things they can not understand

    The more we think, the more we judge the farther away from wellbeing we become

  9. Thanks for your insight

  10. Posted by rudid96 on February 27, 2022 at 5:45 pm

    The sentence “Only be concerned for those who you respect for approval or judgment” leaves me scratching my head. Past relationships were misjudged. Eventually, they either led to pain or emptiness. Can a trauma survivor be truly authentic? It seems there’s an ever-morphing, hyper-vigilant reality in our heads. We cannot trust ourselves let alone others. Our Protector parts are always on alert. Accepting that relationships with humans will never satisfy that child’s Ego and that friendships at best are superficial & short-lived might leave me more content and put an end to the quest.

  11. Some camps think we are incapable of a healthy intimate relationship

    If we are it will have storm clouds from time to time

    I can not stop my nervous system from reacting to challenging times

    I can not truly trust any mate

    What will make u happy Rudid96

    Our ego satisfied

    Ego never is satisfied

    He/she should not be our leader at any time

    True self or our heart is leader

    Maybe intimate relationships are not for us

    Not in our nature

    If I need a mate to be happy

    It’s the external that controls me

  12. We pick the wrong partners

    I picked the female version of my dad for first wife

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