https://pixabay.com/users/holmespj-2061998/
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“Reframing is a technique used by counselors to shift a client’s view of a particular problem, event, or person. It is based on the assumption that when clients are able to view a situation from another perspective, opportunities for finding alternative, acceptable solutions to their problems increase. The effectiveness of reframes in therapy is documented in both clinical outcomes and empirical research.”
From “http://psychology.iresearchnet.com/counseling-psychology/counseling-therapy/reframing/
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My two cents: I think most of us have used reframing in therapy with some good results.
Being a person who has focused on awareness, seeing reality through the fog, I have overlooked one of my strongest stumbling blocks.
Recently while working to heal, trying to open my heart, a glaring weakness appeared. As a kid, I became obsessed and terrified of losing.
It was a survival response to protect me from my father. The only time of safety for me was after a big win. Any loss would infuriate my father, resulting in physical violence.
Yes, I was just better than others, but that came with a heavy price. Fearing loss like this takes any chance of well-being away.
There is always the next challenge, the next chance at losing, feeling confident can always be destroyed by a loss.
Performance equals self-worth, he beat me to make his point, win or you’re worthless.
I am working on reframing this absurd pressure at 70. All that work on the surface or even at deeper levels never reached the source, loss equals worthlessness.
I was brainwashed from such an early age, I believed my first caregiver.
Therapists never uncovered this core deficiency and I did not know my thoughts were this damaging.
Childhood abuse is so intertwined with brain development, we have a hard time distinguishing between the natural process and the abuse that is stored.
Childhood trauma is the small, secretive octopus using its tentacles to disrupt normal life.
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Posted by rudid96 on August 4, 2021 at 3:40 pm
My abusive N parent is still alive. Now, I’ve got the gift (more like an odious, thankless task) of caretaking responsibilities. This parent’s regular manipulation, invalidation, devaluation, discarding, and gaslighting are still in play. Ironically, ‘rewriting our story’ was last week’s exercise in a small, online woman’s group to which I belong. Try as I might, I couldn’t find enough ground to excuse this parent and rewrite the story. When the abuse is still present and ongoing, rewriting isn’t possible.
Posted by Marty on August 4, 2021 at 4:02 pm
That’s hard
Very hard
Better to play defense until he is gone
Then lots of shit will break loose
Well thats my experience
Posted by Trauma Tentacles inside our Brain: Childhood Ptsd on January 9, 2022 at 3:10 pm
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