Changing focus



Working on trauma, worrying about PTSD symptoms, has become counter productive.

I have integrated most of my core abuse over a decade of therapy.

My issues are related to the development of my brain. The fear from childhood imprinted on my defense mechanism.

I realize that my mind spots danger at a prolific rate, my challenge is to calm my reaction.

Two different reactions surface, a freeze response or aggression.

Look how black and white my response, I am hardwired to spot danger in mundane situations, then react.

Guilt, shame and unworthiness are part of the dysfunctional thoughts that come with my reaction.

When avoiding fear runs subconsciously like this, life narrows and taking risks becomes harder.

The other dysfunctional trait finds my mind getting totally consumed with negative thoughts.

This fear has given my PTSD great power.

Now with this awareness, I have found what needs repaired.

Please share your journey with childhood abuse.



7 responses to this post.

  1. This reminds me of how I and My Creator healed me of agoraphobia in 1980. I had no diagnosis or name for it until years after my recovery. I lived at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba. Each day I just walked a little further when the panic came. One day it was no longer there.

  2. Posted by Sara on May 28, 2021 at 6:46 pm

    I relate to this so much.

  3. I improved from my agoraphobia but out there is still risky

  4. I am glad others can relate

    All I know is what I have read and discovered

  5. This is a very apt description of childhood trauma.

  6. Amazing I have been digging up and integrating triggers

    When the hard wired things impact our current behavior

  7. I am glad others relate to what I feel and write

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