https://themighty.com/u/mrpositive/
I was force fed Lima beans once a week, I puked them, then got beat with a big paddle he drilled holes in to hurt me more.
Never have touched a Lima bean since childhood.
.
Our mind does not work the same when PTSD is active.
Anxiety and fear switch the minds mode of operation.
A calm, safe environment has our mind relaxed, open and maybe looking for opportunity, we can think quickly and clearly.
A PTSD mind can spot imminent danger in a second, activating our defense mechanism.
A PTSD sufferer has practiced over and over his/her reaction to trauma, paved a highway to survival mode, becoming best friends with avoidance.
Our mind becomes confused, pressured by anxiety drugs as fear spikes, trying to escape at all costs.
Our mind panics, cognitive functions almost stop, fine motor skills are gone, tunnel vision ensues.
Severe cases mimic near death experiences.
PTSD fear is the worst fear we can imagine, it has the ability to fire our fight or flight mechanism 15 times a day.
The drugs are real, the PTSD is abstract and subjective to us and lives only inside our mind.
The drugs stopped secreting the first time I healed.
Now instead of my fight or flight exploding, my mood changes, spotted and pointed out by those close to me.
My abuse, now at 69, still impacts my daily existence.
It is humbling, frustrating and full of guilt when my PTSD upsets those closest to me.
Hard to not hold anger at our abusers.
There is no wand or pill or quick solution for violent childhood abuse.
.
.
PTSD - A Way Out.com 