https://pixabay.com/users/enriquelopezgarre-3764790/
.
.
We all know conscious fear.
Spotting a shark while swimming, losing an engine on a commercial flight, or being caught in a high rise fire, are obvious events producing intense fear.
My less obvious fears hide inside my past, especially my trauma
They manifest in my consciousness as anxiety, unworthiness, humiliation (shame).
So if an event is in the past, this fear is irrational, but it holds current power inside my being.
Perception becomes reality again. I feel the fear, but discount it’s reality.
I have been exploring the fear, humiliation has brought me.
Why does old shame have such power over us?
Why does an old event live on inside, just out of reach?
Yes, I know it is PTSD, stored implicit memory, but it has a conscious component to it.
What big fear has me grasping decades old humiliation?
Inside our minds, we know there is no real danger, no real fear.
Is some unknown need being met by carrying this anchor around like a medal.
What reward do we receive from honoring old fears?
Awareness of there existence is the first step towards ultimate release, in my opinion.
.
.
PTSD - A Way Out.com 
Posted by rudid96 on January 7, 2021 at 10:42 pm
I haven’t’ commented recently because I’ve been actively turning my attention to something that Mindful Marty suggested in the Dec. 23rd post “A Loyal Follower Responds.” When PTSD grabs hold I’ve continually refocused on THIS moment, mind clear of thoughts, only following the breath. Today’s blog post spoke to me again. Asking my Parts, “where is the fear” and then sitting quietly for an answer is an amazing concept. The positive impact is so much more profound than the anti-anxiety drugs my therapist is trying to push. The drugs to me say “you are hopeless.” Working with our Parts is listening to all those wounded aspects that have been hurt, abused, & neglected.
Posted by Marty on January 7, 2021 at 11:19 pm
Good stuff rudid96
Where is the fear
What do we gain
How do we benefit by keeping this crap