https://pixabay.com/users/Alexas_Fotos-686414/
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“People may become addicted to their own stress hormones, adrenaline and cortisol.
To such persons stress feels desirable, while the absence of it feels like something to be avoided.” (Hans Selye)
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My two cents: My Journey was long and arduous, filled with terror and anxiety. With great effort devoted to healing, my fight or flight mechanism calmed downed, finally quit firing when a trigger arrived.
This was a wonderful accomplishment and a great relief from the constant panic we endure from childhood abuse.
Now, I see that my system was addicted to small amounts of cortisol and adrenaline. I thought this heightened level was normal since life was so much easier than before.
These were smaller doses, not a full fight or flight explosion , dumped to keep my system like it was in childhood.
The “Ego” is irrational at these elevated levels and judges everyone more harshly. Agitated I might take action and cause drama.
I think for me, these drugs make it easier to feel outraged, betrayed or not respected.
Drama follows this heightened state of being.
I have brought awareness to my minds patterns, how these drugs start a heightened dialogue of stress, unworthiness or oppression.
My awareness has uncovered how my “Ego” takes charge the second cortisol and adrenaline get dumped.
My practice and moment to moment awareness are unplugging these patterns now.
Are you running on low doses of cortisol and adrenaline?
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PTSD - A Way Out.com 
Posted by Katie on March 27, 2020 at 1:16 pm
Very well put Marty. I think sometimes I have pretty high doses of cortisol, especially in the morning. Awareness of this helps me tremendously.
Posted by Marty on March 27, 2020 at 1:24 pm
Yea I finally brought awareness to my nervous system and felt it finally calm down to rest
Never felt it like that
That extra level of fear drugs caused a lot of anticipation and drama
Little outbursts have subsided