Pixabay: Mihail_hukuna
.
.
The goal of life is to be Happy.
Happy is not what you think. It is not external, has nothing to do with objects of pleasure that fade quickly.
Happiness does not exist in memories, that is thought, judgment and the past.
Happiness only exists in the present moment, now.
Happiness is internal, a way of living, being.
Do you have any friends that are truly happy?
Examine their life, their purpose, ask them about happiness.
Happiness is not a birth rite, it must be earned.
Happiness happens when gratitude is overflowing, giving to others is vital and the mind is enthralled with observing life.
It is called wonderment. Watch an infant observe something entirely new for the first time.
This no reference, no where to file this stimulus.
For a brief moment wonderment takes over.
We meditate to find more wonderment.
.
.
PTSD - A Way Out.com 
Posted by Marisia Ybarra on December 31, 2019 at 5:45 pm
Seeing my baby grow I realize you are born with 100% happiness. As time goes on if you don’t take care to stay mindful or if trauma comes along you begin to loose that happiness bit by bit. Then getring it back is a struggle, takes work and healing and a lifetime of maintenance. My goal with my baby is to teach her now how to maintain the mindfulness, how to protect happiness with problem solving and emotional regulation. with coping skills. I might not succeed 100%, but if she keep her baby happiness longer than myself I will have been successful.
Posted by Marty on December 31, 2019 at 6:13 pm
Hey Marisia
Kids learn everything, most everything from their first caregivers
Your awareness of that fact is important
Touch, love, quality time emotional regulation
Kids learn to discuss, argue or fight from how mom and dad relate
It is our actions they watch and learn from
I always gave unconditional love for my kids, something I never experienced
I wanted to instill the will to take action and keep going when life kicks your butt
Resilience and freedom of mind are gifts I would reinforce
Be able to take calculated risks at any age seems vital to growth and enjoyment
Posted by Marisia Ybarra on December 31, 2019 at 6:56 pm
Resilience or grit, is what has kept me alive and try now to figure out how to teach that without a seemingly life threatening stimulus. I struggle with freedom, seems dangerous, but neccessary.
Posted by Marty on December 31, 2019 at 7:21 pm
I see that.
For me acceptance was most difficult. I tried to change, to alter my flaws.
I thought they were true, at my core, untouchable.
That judgment was completely wrong but that conviction led to decades of suffering.
If it were true I would not be where I currently am.
So accepting, surrendering to our demons could not be scarier.
Remember build your focus and apply it during the day.
That elephant seems impossible to eat, but focus on daily meals consumes this enormous feast in due time.
Take small risks, wade out in the deep water intermittently.
Have fun with the journey, there is no destination.
Posted by Astrid on December 31, 2019 at 7:53 pm
Thanks so much for saying this. You are so right. I remember one of my teachers in high school once said there is only one moment in your entire life that you can be happy and that’s now.
Posted by Marty on December 31, 2019 at 7:56 pm
We think we earn happiness, need to change something, achieve something when all we need is to let go of thought, focus and observe now.
Takes much practice but benefits arrive everyday
Life is a journey, enjoy the ride
Posted by Astrid on December 31, 2019 at 8:22 pm
Yes, so true. Happiness isn’t dependent on external pleasures really, like you said in your post.