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When a friend betrays me, it feels like a heavy burden.
Seems like I am wounded from the inside.
Trust constricts, life narrows.
Danger appears, I feel it around me!
It takes me time to unwind this old narrative when you live with complex PTSD.
Some of us were abandoned throughout childhood, my attachment physically was a paddle from my father.
That old record can still punch its number on my home juke box, playing “Someone done me wrong Song” again.
I have to clear this mess, let the old narrative go.
It takes a few days, it is not instantaneous.
I thought when I healed life would be simpler, easier, care free like others.
That is another judgment, expectation I have released.
Each of our lives start at a different place and progress at different speeds.
Comparing to others has never benefited me, in fact, it has damaged me.
No moral in this story, lots of roadblocks and distractions on our roadway.
If I do not judge, this breath is perfect, I think!
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