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If happiness only occurs in the present moment, accepting everything about ourselves right now, is imperative.
Things we do not accept, block us from truly being happy.
Common sense tells me these perceived flaws are the doors to our suffering or joy.
It takes persistence and practice to accept our flaws, our unworthy parts, our devious parts and especially our shameful parts.
All these biased judgments have no power as soon as we release them.
I am not my thoughts, or judgments, or emotions, or my ego!
I am present, focused, aware and following what my senses absorb.
The trick is to not identify with our flaws, trading judgment in for being present for this next mundane moment.
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Posted by Vihani on June 2, 2019 at 5:16 pm
In other words, mindfulness! 🙂
Posted by Marty on June 2, 2019 at 6:07 pm
Definitely a way of paying attention and being present for a chance
Posted by Marty on June 12, 2019 at 2:38 pm
Sorry about your sadness.
Now, may I ask what daily healing actions are you undertaking
The only way to improve your impact on your wife is to dedicate your energy to healing and not sadness
Take small specific steps if necessary
Our attitudes change when we decide to take action
Try aerobic exercise to assist our ptsd
Posted by Anonymous on June 13, 2019 at 5:47 pm
Thanks, Marty.
Yeah, so much angst-riddled communication has been going back and forth between me and my wife that makes me really sad, its almost my default emotion. I’m not depressed, just sad.
I know I need to focus on what is good, not the negative, focus on making steps forward, not perseverating on what is wrong.
The homework my psychologist gave me for this week is to make sure my wife sees my effort(s) to making positive changes and to make sure she knows I care about HER happiness. Working on it, but the triggers abound. Perseverance….
Posted by Marty on June 13, 2019 at 6:11 pm
Thanks for your response. I am glad you have a therapist and homework.
One of the issues comes down to attention.
what we focus on becomes reality. For ptsd it is everything.
Dissociate or ruminate and we suffer while ptsd grows.
PTSD will only get worse as time passes.
Have you tried meditating for short periods to build focus.
We have the ability to improve and live fully
If you are open to meditating I will help you